I have helped many couples over the years save their marriages by teaching them a framework for understanding why certain issues seem to recur in their relationship, and then giving them the necessary tools to resolve conflict, communicate more effectively, and restore an intimate emotional bond.
Regardless of whether you have fights that seem to escalate without resolution, are dealing with violations of trust, infidelity, loss of sexual intimacy, or simply feeling a loss of connection, I can give you the tools to help.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is relationship coaching right for you?
This is actually a question I ask myself during my first meeting with a couple. There are three things I look for when assessing whether coaching will be helpful.
- Is there an active addiction going on in the relationship?
- Is there physical or emotional abuse happening in the relationship?
- Are both partners committed to making the relationship work?
If the answer is ‘yes’ to either of the first two questions, then some form of intervention needs to happen to resolve these issues before any form of coaching or therapy can be effective. If the answer is ‘no’ to the third question, and one person has already made up their mind to leave, then I can make a referral to a different type of therapy. But assuming that there is no physical or emotional abuse, and no there are active addictions, and both partners are committed to the relationship, then their chances of success are very good.
How does it work?
I will typically meet with couples for a one-hour session once per week for the first 6-8 weeks. After that, we make a collaborative decision about whether to continue and on what schedule. Both partners need to be present at the sessions and all sessions are conducted online via either Zoom, Google Chat, or Facetime.
How many sessions will we need?
This, of course, varies considerably between couples depending on their situation and goals. In my experience, most couples achieve significant and meaningful progress after about 6-8 sessions—assuming that they put in the effort to implement what we discussed in session. About two-thirds of my clients find enough value in our time together that they decide to continue with coaching sessions for quite some time after the initial period of 6-8 sessions. Just like going to the gym where it takes a little time to notice a change in your physique, it will take a few sessions before you start to notice a difference in your relationship. For this reason, I suggest committing to 8 sessions before determining how effective our sessions are. This is completely optional, but in my experience, the couples who are committed enough to make it through 8 sessions tend to do a lot better than those who aren’t.
How much does it cost?
My standard fee for a one-hour session is $125.
I also offer an 8-session package for $800.
I started offering the 8-session package after noticing that most couples make significant progress within the first 8 sessions. Many couples opt for the first 8 sessions, and then we evaluate their progress and make a decision about how to proceed from there.
Do you accept insurance?
I do not accept any insurance. I only work on a cash basis. For relationship issues, I have just found it better to not involve insurance companies.
Do you work with individuals or just couples?
In general, I do not accept individual clients. The reason is that the skills and experience necessary to effectively help couples is very different than for individuals. It’s like the difference between a dentist and a foot doctor. Yes, they both have advanced medical training, but the skills necessary for one do not necessarily translate well to the other. I will occasionally meet with one partner in a relationship for a session or two to help resolve a particular issue, but as a general rule, I only work with couples.
Do you help address issues with sexual intimacy?
In some cases, yes. In some cases, I will refer to a sex therapist. Sex is a complex issue that involves physical, psychological, and emotional elements. For many couples, the loss of sexual interest is a function of larger problems in the relationship. Once those relationship problems are dealt with, then sex can be addressed fairly easily. However, there are many people who also have more significant psychological and physical issues with sex that are independent of the relationship itself. In those cases, it may be necessary to refer you to a specialist in sex therapy to ensure you receive appropriate treatment.
Are you kink / poly friendly?
Yes. 100%. Human sexuality and intimate bonding take many forms. Being involved in the kink, poly, or swinging lifestyle is every bit a legitimate relationship style as those who prefer monogamy. I have had extensive experience working with consensually non-monogamous couples and poly families who are trying to resolve conflict and improve their communication skills.
Ready to Get Started?
If you are having problems in your relationship that you just can’t seem to resolve, let me help. Click on the button below to contact me and let’s chat.